From an unnamed production office for an undisclosed television show in an address-withheld building in LA where the elevators are shockingly slow...
We just had a quick meeting in my office. The big boss came in for a chat that was kind and measured, but carried this subtext:
"Hey, you three assistants, your entire job can pretty much be boiled down to seven menial tasks that rotate among you. Today the copy and paste task was a failure."
Whose turn was it to copy and paste today? Why, mine of course. And how come I might I be particularly inclined to do a better job at picking the things that I copy and paste? Why, because in December- following another serious copy and paste gaffe on my part- there was major overhaul of the entire copy and paste system that was negotiated during an emergency staff-wide meeting. Why didn't they teach copy and paste in college?? If they couldn't offer copy and paste, why not at least a mind-reading elective?! How could I ever have expected to successfully participate in the work force when I can't even intuit exactly what other people want copied and pasted?! Oh wasted studies! Money! Life!
Additionally, I devoted a good deal of time the other night to making a real grody mess of a bug bite on my face to the end that I now look as though I have scabies, and so it's not as though I wanted to be here today anyway. Cruel world.