March 30, 2010

Ctrl + C, Ctrl + My Head Just Exploded

From an unnamed production office for an undisclosed television show in an address-withheld building in LA where the elevators are shockingly slow...

We just had a quick meeting in my office.  The big boss came in for a chat that was kind and measured, but carried this subtext:

"Hey, you three assistants, your entire job can pretty much be boiled down to seven menial tasks that rotate among you.  Today the copy and paste task was a failure."

Whose turn was it to copy and paste today?  Why, mine of course.  And how come I might I be particularly inclined to do a better job at picking the things that I copy and paste?  Why, because in December- following another serious copy and paste gaffe on my part- there was major overhaul of the entire copy and paste system that was negotiated during an emergency staff-wide meeting.  Why didn't they teach copy and paste in college??  If they couldn't offer copy and paste, why not at least a mind-reading elective?!  How could I ever have expected to successfully participate in the work force when I can't even intuit exactly what other people want copied and pasted?!  Oh wasted studies!  Money!  Life!

Additionally, I devoted a good deal of time the other night to making a real grody mess of a bug bite on my face to the end that I now look as though I have scabies, and so it's not as though I wanted to be here today anyway.  Cruel world.

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