Chopin broccoli

From an unnamed university in the greater San Francisco Bay Area...

One of the things I actually do like about working for a university is the use of student facilities, particularly the workout center. The campus gym is easily the nicest facility in town, and it has the benefit of being very close to where I work, and my membership is pretty cheap (but not free, as some people think).

What I don't like about working out at the campus gym is that I am there with lots of fit, lithe, young undergrads. They prance around in the short shorts, showing off their cellulite-free legs and concave stomachs and I send them hate daggers from the elliptical machine where good lord, I've only been on for 7:34?

I've also found that a lot of said undergrads do not have a sense of humor. Case in point, this morning I went into the locker room and the attendant was no older than 19, reading a large text book at the desk, and listening to a lovely piece of classical music. As she scanned my ID card, I said, "this is beautiful, what is it?" She replied, "[something] by Chopin." Before heading into the locker room, I faux-pompously declared, "I believe that's pronounced 'Choppin'." She looked at me like I was the dumbest person she had ever seen and said, "No, it's Chopin. I know. I'm a music major." She's clearly not a Facetiousness Major.