April 23, 2010
From an unnamed university in the greater San Francisco Bay Area...
We have new workstudy student. Like the others, she is tiny and very attractive. People have accused of us of asking for headshots in addition to resumes when we hire our workstudies because they're all so good-looking, but we really don't. Something about this office just seems to attract pretty girls. Obviously.
We hired her to help out with website stuff and she is some kind of freakish HTML/CSS wunderkind, blowing my newly-honed skillz straight out of the water. The past few days I've given her HTML tasks that a) completely baffle me and b) I assume will take her all day, and she finishes in like 10 minutes. It's impressive, but then I'm like "crap, I don't know what to give you to do for the next 3 hours." Is "fix the internet" something you can ask a student to do?
So until we can think of an assignment worthy of her genius, we've put her to good work: designing new pranks. Her graphic/web design skills are really coming in handy. In addition to the beautiful, Medieval-themed wedding invitation she designed for the dudes next door, she made a bachelor party invitation and is currently designing them a wedding website, complete with a Target registry! Her web design abilities really open up a whole new level of possibility for prankage that we had not considered previously.
In the meantime, one of the guys next door is dressed in all black today, so we're playing Johnny Cash songs as loud as we can.